5 Tips to Keep the Romance Alive in Your Long-Term Relationship



So you have finally settled into the comfortable stages of a long-term relationship and you are happy in your relationship bubble. However, that doesn’t mean that it is time to stop putting in any effort to keep things romantic and exciting.


You never want to be in the position where you feel your partner pulling away, and there are a number of different things you can do that will help keep the romance alive in your relationship.


This doesn’t mean you each have to bend over backwards to do every single thing for them. Instead, cultivate an ongoing intimacy that provides happiness for both parties and keeps the relationship exciting.


It is the responsibility of both partners to keep a relationship flowing nicely, but if you are not sure where to start, there are several little ways that you can do your part. I have compiled a list of 5 effective tips to keep the romance alive in your long-term relationship that are super simple to start using in your relationship now.


1. Continue Dating


Even when you are in an established relationship, it is important to continue dating practices and schedule date nights. Fully commit- so get dressed up, book a table at a nice restaurant and just enjoy each other’s company.


As a couple, you will spend a lot of your time together trying to make decisions and solve problems, so take time out to plan some dates where you don’t have to do any of that. If going out for a date is not a viable option right now, you can bring the date to you. Have a homemade dinner, or order a takeaway and create a restaurant ambience with candles and soft music.


Dating keeps you connected and will remind you that you are a priority to each other.


2. Schedule Sex


It may seem on the corny side, but it works! In our lives, we schedule every aspect, so why not sex? When you decide to schedule sex, it is ensuring that you are both outing intimacy as a priority. This can build the anticipation and desire.


Scheduling sex can demonstrate a commitment to your relationship, improve communication and guarantee quality time with each other. There are many emotional benefits of scheduling sex including:

  • Improving your self-confidence

  • Helping you connect with your own body in a pleasurable way

  • Improving the bond you have with your partner, and expressing love and care for them

However, many people do have happy and romantic relationships without having sex or only having sex with their partners once in a while. We often relate sex with intimacy- and while sex can be a great form of intimacy, it is not the only way to be intimate with your partner. Affectionate touch can be: massages, kissing, cuddling and holding hands.


The act of scheduling sex and intimacy can also help you to be more spontaneous and even experiment, which is a sure way to keep the fire burning in your relationship.


3. Greet Each Other With Physical Touch


Each time you see your partner, you should greet them warmly. Physical touch is important to keep the spark alive. Rather than rushing in to get to the next thing like making dinner, take a moment to give each other a hug and a kiss. Of course, you both need to be comfortable, but it’s a quick and easy way to feel connected with your partner.


When we are touched by our partners our body reacts with a release of the ‘love hormone’ oxytocin, this is associated with empathy, trust and sexual activity. Through physical touch, you can communicate emotions and it makes your partner feel wanted.


4. Do Something New Together


When a relationship gets closer, couples can risk growing apart by closing off to new experiences or limiting each other in certain ways. You need to pay attention to what makes each other happy, each other’s interests and not to restrict each other’s happiness.


It doesn’t mean just taking a big trip and visiting a new place together. It is said that experiencing new things together creates cohesion and intimacy. There are so many new things that you could do together:

  • Cooking a new dish or baking a new recipe

  • Try a new restaurant together

  • Learn a new hobby or skill together

  • Go on a day trip or short getaway to a new place

Doing new things will bring you closer together and you will discover new things about yourself and each other.


5. Acknowledge Each Other's Efforts


It is very important to let each other that you are grateful for the things you do for one another. Acknowledging each other’s efforts shows appreciation and that the relationship is working.


People are usually more than happy to go out of their way for someone they care about if they know that it is being seen and the positive reinforcement can help the other person feel appreciated. Appreciating someone makes them feel good about what they do and it makes a difference in their lives, strengthening your relationship.


It will keep the romance alive because when you both feel appreciated you are much more likely to want to be together because you both feel valued. Each couple will have their own habits that work, but engaging in these positive habits will help to keep the spark and romance alive in your relationship for years to come.


What do you think is important in keeping the romance alive in a long-term relationship? Do you agree with any of these suggestions? I’d love to hear in the comments.

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A 30 something woman navigating life, sharing posts focussing on mental health, midsize fashion, self-care routines and life as a vegan.

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